


A REALLY Bad Day

by SkylaDoragono



Category: Tales of the Abyss
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-10
Updated: 2010-10-10
Packaged: 2017-10-12 14:16:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/125739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkylaDoragono/pseuds/SkylaDoragono
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Luke and his Scooby Gang end up stumbling on Asch, who is stuck ill in a hospital and in need of a certain medication that he refuses to take.  When all else fails, it's up to Luke to talk him into it.  Totally based on a true story.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A REALLY Bad Day

They could hear the familiar scream of outrage all the way from the town entrance, and Luke fon Fabre did not have to look back to know that Natalia was practically dancing on her toes while everyone else cringed. He looked around, half expecting the owner of that scream to be barreling down the street with how loud it was, but it was not until it was apparent that Asch the Bloody would not be popping out of no where as per usual did Luke take a hesitant step forward into the town. Interestingly enough, the townspeople continued to go about their lives as if the rampant enraged screaming were normal, which made him wonder just what the hell was going on and if it was, dare he think it, normal.

"It sounds like it's coming from there," came Tear's voice, calm as ever, beside him, and he glance to the side to see her pointing to the local hospital. Natalia let out a gasp.

"Asch...! Oh, I do hope he's all right!" she exclaimed, already darting forward.

"Well, he sounds perfectly _normal_ to me," Jade replied nonchalantly, trailing behind the group.

At the epicenter, Asch's screaming and cursing was so loud that Anise had to cover her ears. Nurses were rushing around, and the fact that a few were coming back out of a room with bruises made it pretty clear where the former God General was. Luke reached out, grabbing the arm of one before she made it too far away.

"Why's Asch screaming like that?" he asked.

The nurse looked rather aghast. "You're friends with that Oracle soldier?"

Luke rubbed the back of his neck. "In a manner of speaking..."

"He came to us a few days ago because of a stomach wound," the nurse explained, looking a bit sympathetic. "We treated the wound, but there were complications. The Fonons of his stomach are not cooperating with the healing, so we need to use traditional healing methods. When we told him we needed to administer a suppository, well..."

Guy flinched at the mention of the suppository as Anise let out a faint snicker. Natalia looked completely mortified.

"Oh dear, the poor thing!" she exclaimed. "I'll try to calm him down."

The princess started into the room, and as expected, Asch's shouting came to an almost immediate stop as it usually did when Natalia was present. There was a tense moment of silence... before Natalia suddenly let out a yelp, the sound of a bedpan hitting the wall following her hasty retreat out of the room.

"W-well, _really!"_ she said, flustered as she brushed herself off. "Of all the things to..."

Luke made a face, frowning at the wall behind which the room was hidden. "What the heck is he making such a big deal about?" he demanded as Natalia was trying very hard not to insult her fiancé. Luke pushed back his sleeves, taking a deep breath... before starting forward. "I'm going to talk to him."

"Ah, Luke...!" Guy protested. "You know how Asch reacts every time you show up!"

Luke just ignored him, making his way into Asch's room. As expected, the God General took one look at him, and his perpetually grumpy face twisted up into a scowl.

"Get lost, dreck!"

Inwardly, the replica flinched, before inhaling loudly, as if to gather up courage from the air. "Don't tell me what to do when you're making a big fuss over a stupid suppository."

For a moment, Asch looked baffled that Luke was talking back at him, before he growled under his breath, grabbing a mirror from the nightstand and chucking it at him. Luke ducked, letting the mirror shatter to bits against the wall behind him.

"Shut up, dreck!" he bellowed. "You probably don't even know what a suppository _is!"_

"Of course I do! Jade had to give me one once!"

Asch fell silent at that, raising an eyebrow, his expression a mixture of disgust and surprise. The replica actually let that damn necromancer touch him like that, and he was still... well, as annoying as he always was? Luke visibly relaxed a bit, sinking himself onto the foot of the hospital bed.

"Look, it's not that bad, Asch. Really," he continued as his original gave him a disbelieving look. "It's just a little bit of pain, and then it's over."

Asch narrowed his eyes at his replica, though for a moment Luke could see a flicker of uncertainty on his face, before he let out a loud growl.

"Fine! I'll take the damn thing!" he grumbled, turning over on his side.

Luke grinned as the nurses came back in, casting him a grateful look, before setting up to help Asch. The replica took that moment to dart out of the room so he would not have to see it, though the aghast looks he was getting from the others was not what he was expecting.

"What?"

Jade adjusted his glasses, looking _far_ too amused. "Luke... were you referring to that time your stomach was bothering you, and I administered a shot to your rear?"

"Yeah..." Luke began, looking at him like he grew another head. "Isn't that was a suppository is?"

Anise started snickering loudly as Tear hid her face in her hands. Jade adjusted his glasses, the smile on his face spreading.

"Luke," he began patiently. "You have the general area correct, but a suppository is a pill."

"A pill?" Luke asked. "But where is it supposed... to..."

Luke trailed off, eyes slowly widening as Asch started shouting again.

"Why are you spreading tha— what are you—?! No! _No!"_

A loud scream of pain and embarrassment ripped through the hospital as it finally dawned on Luke just what a suppository was supposed to be.

 _**"DRECK!!!"** _

Luke was already bolting out of the door before Asch finished shouting, the others following not all that far behind.


End file.
